Thanks from a 30-year-old single guy

“What’s wrong with him?”

…sometimes seems to be what people think who find out I’m still single at 30 — especially in the state with the youngest average first-marriage age in the country.

“Here’s what you can do to fix yourself…?”

…sometimes follows. There must be something I’m doing wrong that’s kept me from getting married (or being engaged… or having a girlfriend for that matter). And somehow it’s diagnosable within minutes of someone finding that out.

I wish it were that easy.

If there were a formula (stop being so picky; give people more chances; go on a date every week; this woman I’m setting you up with is going to be your wife…), I would be married by now, because I’ve tried every single one ;)

Is it possible that there’s nothing wrong with me?

That’s what I’m here to say thanks for… Some people don’t come from a deficit-based perspective. And it’s a wonderful thing :) I’m grateful for friends, family, acquaintances, and strangers who don’t have marital status as a condition for accepting me.

I’m happy with who I am and where I’m at.

That doesn’t mean I don’t want to be married or that I’ve given up trying. I want to, and I try. But I want to be happy, just like everyone else… And I don’t want something only partially in my control to be a condition of that.

Thanks to everyone who supports me being happy single!


p.s. Check out these views from the Church Office Building and Joseph Smith Memorial Building in Salt Lake. I was there for a training this week.

8 thoughts on “Thanks from a 30-year-old single guy

  1. My question is, “what’s wrong with the girls you are interested in?” They’re the ones I feel sorry for because they’re missing out on knowing you. I’m sorry if I’ve ever tried to give you a “formula” because there isn’t one. Sometimes things workout and sometimes they don’t. I love you just the way you are and I’m happy you’re happy. (And between me and you, I tell my friends that you’re my favorite brother because of how kind and accepting you are of others.) so I’m sorry that you have people who are not accepting of you in return. Love you Zachy! And I’m always here for you if you need to talk or go on a sibling date.

  2. Thank you for sharing this strength and courage you find.
    I take courage from your strong testimony of Jesus Christ and His plan for you, and your willingness to follow it wherever He leads.
    Much love.

  3. Great response! You want longevity & everafter; and that happens when you and God jointly steer the process. Continue in prayer–she’s being prepared for you & you’re being prepared for her — for a ‘lifetime.’

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